Sausage, Butter, Tampons

If you're confused by the title, that's fine. It makes no sense standing alone but it will, I promise!

I receive daily emails about product recalls and this was the title of one a few weeks ago, as it was the items featured in that day's email - sausage, butter, tampons. I jokingly updated my social media status to say that I would title my, hopefully, one day to-be-published book. That isn't true! But it did get me thinking - what are sausage, butter and tampons? Well, for me, they're analogous with parts of life. And if you know me at all, you know I love analogies!

Sausage - big, thick, meaty, of substance; sometimes spicy, other times mild; Can be crumbly or solid (link or patty); And while it has some grease dripping off that we don't need to put into our bodies, the large portion of it satiates us, keeps us full.

Butter - SO GOOD! And yet so bad. Who needs butter? NEEDS! NO ONE! Yes, some recipes call for it and it is delicious, especially when it's melted and drizzled atop a corn cob, mashed potatoes, big fluffy biscuits. But do we need it? NOPE! Does it make us feel good, bring us comfort? Absolutely!

Tampons - we all know what those are! And while they do serve a purpose, and are needed at times, the bottom line is they're a mess. And everyone knows they're there, but no one talks about them.

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SAUSAGE

The sausages of my life are the big things, the things that matter the most - family, friends, security, faith and worth.

Family is important for obvious reasons. I am not limiting my definition of family to the ones related to you by blood because for me it goes far beyond blood. Family are the ones who are there 100% without a doubt, day or night. I've got a group of people in my life I consider my family because I know I can count on them no matter what. We share love, not blood. And I've got some with whom I share blood and not so much love 😐

And then I've got friends. I've got REAL life friends - the ones I see and talk to frequently. I've got VIRTUAL friends - the ones I've "met" through social media. The ones I can seek advice from because they're close enough to be honest without being complete asses, but are also distant enough to be objective. I really love this group!

The security is about job, or anything of meaning that fills your time; your finances; your education; your knowing you'll be okay. I don't think any aspect of security is possible without friends and family because no matter how tough we are or want to be, we all need help and support.

Faith - I DON'T CARE WHO YOU WORSHIP! I love God. The one in the Bible. If he's not who you choose, it's okay with me. I'm still your friend or your family because I love YOU. But let's face it, no matter who or what you worship, we all know we are not the biggest and the end all. We can believe the stars are directing our course of life - those are bigger than we are. We can believe God put us where we need to be - He's bigger than we are. We can believe it's WHATEVER - and whatever it is, it's bigger than we are. If it wasn't, we wouldn't seek comfort in it when we need a sign that everything is going to be all right.

And worth - this one is tough for me because I often feel worthless. But no matter how I feel, it's a huge part of life. We all want to feel worthy. We all want to matter and be needed. We don't want to simply be an obligation.

These are sausages because most of the time, most of them are great. They give me purpose and hope. But they also come with their own form of grease - families and friends fight, quit talking, disagree. Our security is unsteady sometimes. Our faith wavers, especially when life gets tough. Our worth, or what we feel we're worth, can just bring us down.

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BUTTER

This is the good stuff that you indulge in that really isn't doing you any good. For me, it's things like playing Candy Crush, watching Days of Our Lives or Friends OVER AND OVER AND OVER, drinking a glass of wine or a beer. Whatever it is that entertains me and makes me feel good. BUT...are they things I need? Absolutely not! Do they make me feel good? Most of the time. They help me escape from reality, give me a break and help me to de-stress. Are they doing anything for me mentally or physically? Nope.

And while these things can just add fat or calories to life, they're all still very important. Candy Crush on the surface does absolutely nothing to improve my life. What it does do is keep my brain busy. It makes me do something difficult until I achieve it.

What does Days of Our Lives do? I know the typical soap opera stereotypes - lying, cheating, betrayal, infidelity, and the list goes on. The last couple of years, the story lines have become very topical both among society as a whole and for me personally. I've watched shows about a cop shooting a young black man; rape and sexual assault; suicide and mental illness. I'm not trying to get you to watch DOOL or any other soap. I don't care if you watch TV at all. You can make fun of me for watching it. I don't care. I'm just saying that while these "butters" of life seem meaningless, they can actually have a meaningful impact. They mean something to us whether they actually matter to anyone else or not. And if they make you happy, embrace your butter!

I really don't need to say anything about watching Friends. I've binged the series multiple times. It makes me laugh every time, and I genuinely love laughter. I love hearing it. I love doing it.

Drinking - no one needs to do this! We know it's toxic. But sometimes I need to relax and it's just a quick fix. A lot of times I'm with friends or family while I'm doing it. We're watching football, playing games or at karaoke. Can we do all of these things without alcohol? YEP! Do I sometimes enjoy those things more with alcohol? YEP!

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TAMPONS

I'm not going to talk about tampons or periods. We know what those are. But the tampons of life are the messes - and everyone has them! We don't talk about them. We tiptoe around and try to hide them sometimes. It's easy to feel ashamed of the mess but everyone has a messy life in one way or another. We might have a past that we aren't proud of. We might suffer from mental illness. We might closet eat or drink, or have another secret addiction. The point is, it's just part of life.

My mess is my depression and anxiety. I've shared before and have been very open and honest about my multiple suicide attempts. Does anyone want to talk about that? NOPE! Does it need to be discussed? YEP! I've learned from sharing my struggles that I am not alone. Other people can relate to how I feel. And sharing my story might actually help someone else who is dealing with the same thoughts. No one's situation is identical but no one understands depression more than someone who is depressed. I was told once that it's both a blessing and a curse.

Don't be ashamed of your mess. We can't hide them from everyone forever. And we shouldn't have to. Do you need to talk about it to everyone? Certainly not. But know that while messes are a part of life, we were also given friends, family and resources to help clean up our messes. Our messes are a part of us, part of our story.

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I encourage you to think about what are the sausages, butters, and tampons of your lives. Think about why they fit where they do and embrace them. We all have some of each. We all have our own story. Be proud of yours!